Self-Care is becoming a thing of the past…
Don’t get me wrong.
Self-care is important and vital to your health and wellbeing.
But the conversation about self-care in the media sounds like a broken record at this point and doesn’t get to the heart of the real nourishment we’re craving at this time in history.
Yes, you might be “doing the things” that are good for you (or at least trying) and at the end of each day you either did them or you didn’t.
Done consistently, you will benefit.
Done inconsistently, not so much. . .
Either way though, you are enough!
Guilting, “shoulding” or shaming yourself into doing any of it – the steps, the healthy eating, the right amount of sleep, etc. – only makes these habits feel joyless and unfulfilling.
And while you get to let yourself off the hook, part of you knows that self-neglect will always lead you down an unhealthy path.
Ultimately, there’s a middle ground with self-care that should involve playfulness and fun as well as maturity that takes on the form of inner parenting.
However, there’s a longing for a deeper level of self-care that requires a paradigm shift.
I think of it as soul-care.
Soul-care is a form of self-care that creates a safe and sacred space for ALL of you to have the freedom to engage, play and find your unique expression.
We go through life compartmentalizing aspects of the real Self in order to manage how safe we feel in the world, how we meet our obligations at home and work and how we navigate the logistics of living.
Then, when you tap into what’s happening in the collective, there is hostility towards those who stand out and so we shut down even more.
We wear masks to hide the parts of us that don’t feel safe being seen and witnessed.
But how often do you give your authentic self a chance to find its full expression in a safe and sacred container?
A space where it can breathe and just be.
Does that space have a community or circle of friends?
Does that space have a creative outlet for its expression?
Does that space feel sacred in how it provides a refuge?
Is that space a literal physical space?
and/or
Is it a space within yourself that you can access at any given time, even when you’re wearing a mask?
Many years ago, while working at an office, I answered the phone with my usual warm, friendly tone and the partner on the other end said, “Jean, how can you be happy all the time? How is that possible?”
I noticed both curiosity and annoyance in his tone.
It took me aback for a moment as I contemplated how to respond.
I smiled at the part of me that wanted to share how I was on a journey of self-awakening, but then the practical side went with meeting him at his level of logic.
“Well, would you rather I answer the phone grumpy?”
He laughed as I continued. “I mean, when you call me, you’re usually stressed and under pressure to get something over to a client, soooo. . .”
He continued laughing as he conceded, “Fair enough!”
That memory is a milestone to me because I went home that evening and realized that my purpose isn’t just served out in my role as a healer and teacher, but in all dimensions of life, including that corporate job.
Yes, I was wearing a mask at the time, but I didn’t let the mask disconnect me from my whole and authentic self.
On some level, that partner received the presence of my true Self without me needing to pull away my mask.
How you meet each person, at each moment throughout the day is an opportunity to “be” your purpose and in turn contribute to the bettering of the world by sharing your whole and authentic Self.
This is what the paradigm shift from self-care to soul-care is all about.
You find safe and sacred ways to engage with the parts of you that long to be witnessed and given the freedom to be a part of your life experience.
And in turn, you can use that level of soul-care to stay self-connected when wearing your masks as you engage in dimensions of life that aren’t ready for ALL of you.
Join me for The Art of (Un)Becoming- an online healing immersion and discover how you can create a sacred space for your own soul-care and allow something new to constellate in your life.
